Allow me to advise you...

Perhaps you're new to dorm advising. Let me recount some of my first impressions and beyond.

I recall sitting in the office during my first few dorm shifts, thinking about how useless I felt. I could not stem the tide of in and out. I could not tell where each person was at all times, let alone assure myself they were making good choices at all.

I eventually found comfort in comparing myself to a father reading the paper in the den. He may be quiet and seem superfluous. But without him home, all hell might (and very likely will) break loose.

So, as you are new to the position, be sure to bring a crossword, or a book of poetry. But choose short poetry, preferably, for you are developing your filter. You are understanding which noises matter, and which do not: the difference between a death squeal, and a stinkbug squeal (remarkably similar); the difference between a peaceful silence, and a sullen silence; the difference between a pool cue pounding the floor, and a human head hitting the floor.

On the long shifts of the weekend, you just maintain your position, if you can do nothing else. Perhaps the trash needs to be taken out, or the office dusted, or the windows cleaned, or the fridge organized. Yes, perhaps. But there are times when those possibilities will seem out of the question, and as an alternative, you will find yourself sitting mute at the desk, mechanically playing Words with Friends (and maybe even losing...), occasionally adding another sticky note to the desk. Go ahead, leave those items til Monday. You'll do it by mid-week if it's still bothering you. Of course you will, for there will in fact be times when you are thoroughly rested, showered, fed, and exercised: the students will appear to be more what they are to Jesus. They are not merely trials sent from the enemy to irk and bewilder. You will then feel that treating them as precious children in your care is the truly logical option.

Loving the students will feel different all day long, depending on the status of your mind and body. You will continually reset your expectations, until finally the digital clock reads 10:00, and you cut the internet. Perhaps then, love will look its hardest: their curfew is not your curfew. Keep going. Force yourself to check the cleaning, listen about the mean teacher, sympathize with how girls/boys are such confusing creatures, take their side, and then depart in as much peace as you can find, there at the bottom of the barrel. It'll be enough. Of course it will, for you'll go back to your room, ignoring the dishes and the grading, and you'll hit the Shawn McDonald station on Pandora, and pray that God would keep each one of those young people.

Keep them, Oh God.

Marshmallows are Good, in the Right Context

Today at lunch, we were talking about our favorite desserts. One person mentioned Rice Krispies treats, to which someone else said, "I'm not a big marshmallow person."

I thought, "Good."


Photo Credit:
http://www.screened.com/stay-puft-marshmallow-man/15-839/all-images/132-1956243/staypuft_marshmallow_man/131-223657/

Fathers

This is a prayer: here it is.
Right here.

From:
The ones who have never known the strong and trustworthy
handclasp goodnight,
who have looked through the window to wish, not know,
that dad was nearby,
who have hoped and failed, or never hoped and still failed,
to gain approval,
who have wondered when they could begin to call themselves
true men and women.

This is a prayer: here it is.
Right here.

To:
Our Father who is in heaven.

Hyphens

I thought I should explain how to use hyphens in my writing class. I pulled out my handy copy of Eats, Shoots, and Leaves by Lynne Truss for some catchy example:

"extra-marital sex
extra marital sex"

I had made a brief overhead for the purpose, and revealed this example first, as an attention-getter, and a way to make my main point. Of course they laughed, as I had hoped. I prepared to dig into hyphens: "You guys may laugh," I say, "but I see this every day! [pause] No, well, I mean, I, I see the lack of hyphen..."

By then, no one could hear me for the giggles. Class was five minutes from being over. But class was over.

Love Poem: Valentine's Day

I don't feel loving this moment.
Especially if "loving" translates to "lovable,"
Forget it.
Seems like only narcissists pine.
All I want out of this day that promises so much
is for the sun to rise,
to have a second second second chance
to do the everyday things with passion and joy
and more love.
That's all I want... to want.

It's Wednesday. It's February. We're going to be fine.

I just finished reading The Hunger Games. I'm devastated and worthless after finishing a book. Time to go outside for a walk in the dark. Sure, it's melancholy, but not as much as looking at pictures from my high school graduation which I happened upon today. What a windy day. And whatever, Kelly wasn't the only one in National Honor Society. The rest of us returned our hoods immediately after the ceremony to avoid incurring a fine. And it's anyone's guess as to why Sly just can't behave in any of these photos.

Side by Side

Side by side on my dresser
Are two folded papers.

One is the program from a memorial service:
A friend expired at age 25
Because, for reasons I can't know,
In Brooklyn one night,
He decided to jump.

The other is a thank you card:
A friend decided to keep living at age 25
Because, she tells me,
"There is still hope somewhere,
Even when I can't feel it."

Unicorn Facts

General: Unicorns usually weigh around 1,000 pounds (450 kilos), and don't mind who knows it. They can have extraordinarily long lives. Some experts claim that under normal circumstances, unicorns are immortal. No evidence exists to the contrary. All unicorns are born on February 29th.

Typical habitat: Forests, usually near streams (for which they may or may not be responsible for creating by their presence); also, but rarely, deserts.

Horn: All unicorns have a single horn protruding from the center of the forehead.Not all unicorn horns exhibit magical capabilities. The magical horn of a unicorn is the result of a combination of fairy dust, prayer, and an irregularity on the 29th chromosome.

Powers: Those unicorns with magical horns have powers of healing and of granting certain wishes. The sense of humor of a unicorn is known to diffuse any awkward situation, including, but not limited to, meetings with in-laws, court-ordered community service, and the first day of school.

Social Behavior and Interests:


-despise bawdy jokes, but have been known to drop curse words on occasion.

-do not tend to be outgoing. But they will be your friend, if cornered.

-rarely gather in groups. When they do gather in groups, they find themselves watching their favorite movies.

-will help you move your refrigerator.

-take a lively interest in the soap-opera lives of squirrels.

-are credited with the idea for Read Across America Day (paired with Dr. Suess' birthday celebration on March 2nd).

-enjoy daisies and bananas.

-are incapable of holding a grudge.

-can become annoyed in two ways: by exaggerating their healing powers, or by assuming they have no views on politics, specifically healthcare bills.

-maintain excellent hygiene.

-often read novels, especially when traveling.

Sources:


Bill the Unicorn. Personal Interview. 13 April 2011.


Senator Frederick "Fred the Unicorn" Loannes. Personal Interview. 13 April 2011.


Silton, Sybil. Silton's Approximate Geographical Guide to Unicorns. Trans. Carolyn McKalips. Ulaanbaatar: 1200. Vellum print.




image: http://lair2000.net/Unicorn_Dreams/Unicorn_History/modern_unicorns.html