Special Week

I get blogging opportunities far less here at camp than at home. Last week was special week, people with special needs, all with mental disabilities. Here is an excerpt from my journal:

"How do I record so many new experiences? Lana is an adult with Down's Syndrome. She is so quiet and full of sweetness. It's as if she knows all the secrets of the Kingdom, all the secrets of happiness.

"She speaks softly. She lets the leaves on the bough above her dance. And dance. And in her heart, I think she is dancing, too; because her smile is wonder to me. Her hugs draw me close and she plants a kiss on my cheek. She is trusting me with all she has.

"Linda mutters during naptime. She has multiple personalities and maybe Down's Syndrome. She knows how to o everything regarding her own hygiene and she keeps track of others' whereabouts. She can understand various, more complex subjects. Her conversation tells me this. Yet--where is her peace? Oh Lord, she does not have the same apparent simplicity as Lana. So where does she rest?"

This Summer

Maybe you've heard, though I decided only about a month ago. I'm at Black Rock Retreat for the summer. I am happily a senior camp counselor until August seventh.

For mailing purposes:

Carolyn McK

c/o Black Rock Retreat

1345 Kirkwood Pike

Quarryville, PA 17566

We're Going to the Beach

and we're going to bring:

an Apple

a Bag for the apples

a Carabiner

a Dog

Extra oil

a Fart("uh... I mean... a Frisbee")

a Great blue heron

Hummus

an Ibis ("to keep the heron company")

Jokes

a Kite ("Not the bird!")

a Loser

M&M's ("oh! oh! Or MadLibs!")

Nectarines

Oreos

Peaches

Quilting Needles

Rum!

Strawberries

a Tacklebox ("We're done here, aren't we?" "Yes." "Oh, definitely.")

I'm compiling games to bring along to camp. This is one of them. I'm tempted to be the mean counselor who brings a verbal riddle, like the elephant game. I still hate the elephant game.

Notebook Exploration

These are from fall of 2007, my one semester at Houghton College.

I found this haiku in the front of my notebook for advanced composition with Dr. Susan Bruxvoort Lipscomb:

If at first you

Can't count to five syllables,

You're probably me.

I found this letter to God in the back of my notebook for English literature survey with Dr. Wardwell. That was the best class I have ever taken. During finals, I was pacing the lengths of the bookshelves memorizing slices of poetry and their authors. When I wrote this letter, I had just taken a long look at Gulliver's Travels and was about to move on to The Rape of the Lock. But my mind stopped. So I began:

I want to tell You all about it by a shimmering stream, beneath a cerulean sky. But I have a light brown study carrel with a light that hums next to a window and a heater. And I have a very serious amount of studying to do for my final in two days. But, God, I'm just so SO--! I want to tell You under a starry sky, with the world beneath You and I together. We'd watch each star as it watched us, and You'd tell me a secret and I would make You laugh.

But I have a hundred (or two dozen) goodbyes to make. And who knows for how long it will be? One year? This lifetime? All eternity? Jesus only You could know... I'm just so--! So mad and clueless, expectant and helpless. So scared and tired, excited and weary. And not busy. Like I should be.

Even though I walk the shores, all the mountains, town after town, one city, then another, even though I see Your creation right beside all that of man, I will always listen for Your voice. It always calls me here. To begin again at the beginning, while I'm in the middle of everything busy, getting ready to make a change. I'll start with You. And I'll end with You.

Reality

is boxes lining my left wall. Time for moving.

I will be spending this summer at Black Rock Retreat as a senior counselor. The first time I saw the place was the day of the interview. As I described it to the camp director, it was my "last-ditch effort at being obedient." I would be glad to see you if you decide to retreat there this summer!

Things I Learned

today:

1. Mulan was a real person

2. I am tired of writing.

3. I may get to be a camp counselor at Black Rock Retreat this summer...

Seagull Staredown

I ride the bus.
Lately I've noticed the seagulls at the shopping center.
They are a flock!
All at once they rise as the bus passes by,

to the right near the guitar store.
They are a ruckus.
They settle on the other side of the central parking lot.
Here we come--the bus monster!
They are mad, fat beach pigeons.
As we pass by the grocery, one stares at us: eyes wide, beak working.
He curses us in seagull.