A man (or woman, for that matter) would never compose an essay to tell his beloved of his affection. Or perhaps some would. But it's my sense that many have tried to write an essay on such a subject, and it has merely resulted in poetry. Poetry has arisen out of a desire to say something, just so, when it really matters, without saying any more than is absolutely necessary. As evidence of the poetic economy of words, I present E. Barrett Browning's “Sonnet of the Portuguese XLIII”: "How do I love thee?/ Let me count the ways. / I love thee to the depth and breadth and height / My soul can reach [...]." She would not have, could not have better displayed her deepest sentiments in an essay; these thoughts are so laden with emotion that they cannot be researched, and cannot be taught, but are worth relating nonetheless!
Artist Ibiyinka Alao believes that “art is frozen music.” He often writes a poem alongside his artwork: something that could be set to music, or that carries a rhythm of its own, to give another dimension to his work. All people know volumes untold of what good poetry is, because all socialized people have a thousand songs stored in their memories. Music and poetry overlap, intertwine, and become inseparable. But no one suggests that music is clichéd, only that there is good music and bad music, according to taste. And so it is with poetry.
I begin to sound redundant when I say that weddings have also arisen out of the very best parts of humanity, out of the peak of civilization. One may ask what is the point of a ceremony at all? One sociologist explains that "[r]ites of passage often reinforce religious principles for the individuals taking part in them and for the community members witnessing them" (Esposito). He goes on to claim that “[r]ites of passage provide members of a community with an opportunity to reflect on the meaning and purpose of life” (Esposito). Attending a wedding is a physical reminder of life’s transience and beauty.
Every civilization I have ever heard of has some sort of ceremony to unite two people, a universal acknowledgement of union. Despite such thin evidence as that, it is clear to me that the union derives significance from this acknowledgement. Even cursory attendance at a wedding is very meaningful to the bride and groom. Who but their community of friends and family should bear witness to and affirm, thereby validating, their commitment to each other? Showing up to a wedding is saying that you have witnessed this pledge, and you'll do your own part to ensure its continuation. Though the ceremony itself differs across the globe, the one thing that remains the same is the need for witnesses, the communal aspect of a wedding.
Having said this, why make long trips or go to great inconvenience to attend weddings, when it is possible to visit with the friend(s) at a time and place when both can benefit more directly from the interaction? Firstly, visiting is quite different from witnessing. One goes with different expectations, but both interactions have a value all their own.
The stipulation of geography is notable, however, in that it begs the question of whether the bride/groom are indeed a part of my community. Secondly, then, I might travel across half the country for a family member’s wedding, for the couple will always be part of one’s community, being united by blood and law, as it were. But traveling so far for a friend is a different bag of pretzels entirely. If the friend is bound to remain in that location for an indefinite period of time, it is more possible that he or she will fade from my community, making my attendance at said wedding less important, indeed, little more than sentimental.
Works Cited
Alao, Ibiyinka. “The Music Party.” Visions of True Colors: of Art, Infinity, Eternity and our Hearts. n.d. Web. 4 Dec. 2012.
Barrett Browning, Elizabeth. “Sonnets from the Portuguese XLIII.” Cummings Study Guide. 2005.
Ed. Michael J. Cummings. Web. 1 Dec. 2012.
Esposito, John L.. "Rites and Rituals." The Islamic World: Past and Present. Dec. 1 2004: n.p.
SIRS Issues Researcher. Web. 02 Dec 2012.
No comments:
Post a Comment